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Chilled by Ragnar949 Chilled :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 10 2 Piecing it Together by Ragnar949 Piecing it Together :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 21 4 Red Stripe by Ragnar949 Red Stripe :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 40 5 Prehistoric by Ragnar949 Prehistoric :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 29 7 Slid into Pastel by Ragnar949 Slid into Pastel :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 49 3 Industrial Muscle by Ragnar949 Industrial Muscle :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 44 5 In Support by Ragnar949 In Support :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 33 6 Your Impish Smile by Ragnar949 Your Impish Smile :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 48 11 Falling Off The Rails by Ragnar949 Falling Off The Rails :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 22 2 Life is Becoming a Circus by Ragnar949 Life is Becoming a Circus :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 22 7 Aggression by Ragnar949 Aggression :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 28 6 All in  Row by Ragnar949 All in Row :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 18 0 The Rise by Ragnar949 The Rise :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 86 16 Window Dressing by Ragnar949 Window Dressing :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 73 9 Brushed by Ragnar949 Brushed :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 32 0 Commercial Abstract by Ragnar949 Commercial Abstract :iconragnar949:Ragnar949 52 4

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Journal
pieced together



:iconragnar949:.:iconbloodspice:.:iconzumrutsahin:
:iconRichardLeach:RichardLeach
:iconrichardleach:RichardLeach 8 9

Activity


Piecing it Together
The seizures wiped a lot of memory away, but everyday, sometimes every hour, I remember something.  At times I find myself wondering how to spell a word like 'what.'  seriously.  It came after about  thirty seconds.  But it looks like my short term memory is worse.  I am not sure how that could be.;) (Wink)  The biggest change has been, I am quite happy but I can't seem to force myself to read, and I read more than most.  I am also wired up like my adrenal glands are firing continuously.  It's a trip.  
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Prehistoric
I am glad to be back.  I've actually been out shooting...when I remember.  Things are "interesting" every single day...and that's a good thing.
I hope you all are well.
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But I understand I've been here for years.

I remember people's names but not a whole lot more...I do remember much of your art though.

Last Tuesday it appears I had a series of seizures that each lasted about 10 to 15 seconds each. I'd slump to me knees or against a wall (at the voting station) and just blankly stare off. I guess I scared quite a few people..esp my son and wife. When I came out of it at voting my wife and an EMT (who was working at the polls) said that I need to get to an ER fast. I said not until I vote. Which I did.  It's my responsibility.  I don't remember who I voted for because I cannot remember anything about the day until 11 at night on the neurology floor. In Neenah Wisconsin. What I do remember is the great staff from the CAs to RNs, they were top shelf. We laughed for two and half days straight. Simply wonderful people.  I never let anyone leave my room without first having a real laugh.  That too I feel is the responsibility of the patient, everyone is happy that way.  I learned that years ago when sharing a room with a guy at a hospital after an (my) appendectomy, who whined and moaned ceaselessly and was nothing but nasty to the staff.  I should note that I don't condemn the man for his pain we all feel it differently I have a very high tolerance, but what was wrong with him was meanness.  I don't have much tolerance for that.

The doc said after all the tests that I have the brain of a thirty year old and that they could detect no sign of brain aging. All brain waves are as they should be. He thinks it's very possible it was a virus (I had been really sick with sinus), but they can't know for sure unless I am wired up when/if I have another episode. They'll shoot out here and do it at home if it occurs again. I guess I had at least ten of them on Tuesday.  The interesting part of it is that I've lost nearly all of my memory going back about ten years. All I could remember is my son's wedding. I recognized our house when we came home but didn't know it was ours. At the hospital I couldn't remember any room in our house except for the basement where I rock out and make things. Doc says I should get everything back but Tuesday, nothing was recorded. Bit by bit my wife will remind me of something and it comes back to a degree, more and more is coming back. I have to say this is a very strange but also a fascinating ride. I think the oddest thing is that I remember the landscape everyone I've seen, every inch of every river I have fished, I remember places and people's faces and our relationship but little else.  Also they finally told me that for years and years I've had a 7mm cyst on my Pineal gland (center of brain) which produces melatonin...no wonder my hair is thinning, have lost most of my body hair and I have nasty insomnia. Other than those things the cyst has no effect on anything else.  They can aspirate it but they don't think that there is any value in doing so, and who needs a seven day stay in the hospital?  I disagree a bit, if I can sleep better without drugs, my hair grows again,... sounds worth it to me...but, none of that is guaranteed, but like I said it may be worth a try, getting more than four to six hours of sleep at night would be a dream come true.


I just got home today and found that without muscle memory I would have forgotten nearly every song I've played on the guitar.  There are still lots of holes where I sit down to play a certain song and I have nowhere to begin.  But if the fingers "remember" just three notes, it starts to come back.  I know this all may sound scary--it sure has been for my wife son etc.  But like I said this process is really fascinating for me.  I just remembered that last normal thing I do remember is my wife and I taking pictures of a strange snow drift in our backyard, I hope I can remember what to do with the files.;) (Wink)   Oh yeah some of my sentence structure is out of whack, I guess I'll be waiting for that to return as well.  I had to do a lot of editing and I am sure I missed more.

That's my story, take care and be careful out there.

Make it good,

Michael

But I understand I've been here for years.

I remember people's names but not a whole lot more...I do remember much of your art though.

Last Tuesday it appears I had a series of seizures that each lasted about 10 to 15 seconds each. I'd slump to me knees or against a wall (at the voting station) and just blankly stare off. I guess I scared quite a few people..esp my son and wife. When I came out of it at voting my wife and an EMT (who was working at the polls) said that I need to get to an ER fast. I said not until I vote. Which I did.  It's my responsibility.  I don't remember who I voted for because I cannot remember anything about the day until 11 at night on the neurology floor. In Neenah Wisconsin. What I do remember is the great staff from the CAs to RNs, they were top shelf. We laughed for two and half days straight. Simply wonderful people.  I never let anyone leave my room without first having a real laugh.  That too I feel is the responsibility of the patient, everyone is happy that way.  I learned that years ago when sharing a room with a guy at a hospital after an (my) appendectomy, who whined and moaned ceaselessly and was nothing but nasty to the staff.  I should note that I don't condemn the man for his pain we all feel it differently I have a very high tolerance, but what was wrong with him was meanness.  I don't have much tolerance for that.

The doc said after all the tests that I have the brain of a thirty year old and that they could detect no sign of brain aging. All brain waves are as they should be. He thinks it's very possible it was a virus (I had been really sick with sinus), but they can't know for sure unless I am wired up when/if I have another episode. They'll shoot out here and do it at home if it occurs again. I guess I had at least ten of them on Tuesday.  The interesting part of it is that I've lost nearly all of my memory going back about ten years. All I could remember is my son's wedding. I recognized our house when we came home but didn't know it was ours. At the hospital I couldn't remember any room in our house except for the basement where I rock out and make things. Doc says I should get everything back but Tuesday, nothing was recorded. Bit by bit my wife will remind me of something and it comes back to a degree, more and more is coming back. I have to say this is a very strange but also a fascinating ride. I think the oddest thing is that I remember the landscape everyone I've seen, every inch of every river I have fished, I remember places and people's faces and our relationship but little else.  Also they finally told me that for years and years I've had a 7mm cyst on my Pineal gland (center of brain) which produces melatonin...no wonder my hair is thinning, have lost most of my body hair and I have nasty insomnia. Other than those things the cyst has no effect on anything else.  They can aspirate it but they don't think that there is any value in doing so, and who needs a seven day stay in the hospital?  I disagree a bit, if I can sleep better without drugs, my hair grows again,... sounds worth it to me...but, none of that is guaranteed, but like I said it may be worth a try, getting more than four to six hours of sleep at night would be a dream come true.


I just got home today and found that without muscle memory I would have forgotten nearly every song I've played on the guitar.  There are still lots of holes where I sit down to play a certain song and I have nowhere to begin.  But if the fingers "remember" just three notes, it starts to come back.  I know this all may sound scary--it sure has been for my wife son etc.  But like I said this process is really fascinating for me.  I just remembered that last normal thing I do remember is my wife and I taking pictures of a strange snow drift in our backyard, I hope I can remember what to do with the files.;) (Wink)   Oh yeah some of my sentence structure is out of whack, I guess I'll be waiting for that to return as well.  I had to do a lot of editing and I am sure I missed more.

That's my story, take care and be careful out there.

Make it good,

Michael

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Ragnar949
MJM
Artist | Professional | Varied
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:iconjacac:
JACAC Featured By Owner 2 days ago
t h a n k . y o u . MJM . =)=)
l a t e . h a p p y . b i r t h d a y . :Blush:
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:iconragnar949:
Ragnar949 Featured By Owner 1 day ago  Professional General Artist
Hey I am late for it too.;) (Wink)   Thanks
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:iconjacac:
JACAC Featured By Owner 20 hours ago
U P S ! =)=)
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:iconchriseastmids:
chriseastmids Featured By Owner 4 days ago  Hobbyist Photographer
MJM many thanks for the fave ad :D
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:iconragnar949:
Ragnar949 Featured By Owner 3 days ago  Professional General Artist
my pleasure
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:icondasghul:
DasGhul Featured By Owner 5 days ago   General Artist

:iconghulscomeinpeace1plz::iconghulscomeinpeace2plz::iconghulscomeinpeace3plz::iconghulscomeinpeace4plz::iconghulscomeinpeace5plz:
:iconghulscomeinpeace6plz::iconghulscomeinpeace7plz::iconghulscomeinpeace8plz::iconghulscomeinpeace9plz::iconghulscomeinpeaceaplz:
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Peaceful Thanks!

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:iconleothefox:
leothefox Featured By Owner 5 days ago   General Artist
la in love Happy late birthday! Art is love 
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:iconragnar949:
Ragnar949 Featured By Owner 5 days ago  Professional General Artist
Many thanks!
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:iconleothefox:
leothefox Featured By Owner 5 days ago   General Artist
:hug:
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:iconalteraltery:
alteraltery Featured By Owner 6 days ago  Hobbyist General Artist
Birthday cake  icon 
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